This month has been a trying and tiring month for me. I found out the hard way that the past comes back to haunt you when you least expect it. I started work in April for Spring Mobile an AT&T Authorized Retailer, things were going very good and I was really enjoying my job. I was being trained as an opener and closer for the two different stores. At one point it was even mentioned that I might be trained as an assistant manager. But during this time home life started to get a little complicated. My friend Travis's lover got really sick and ended up in ICU at Shands Hospital in Jacksonville, FL. I ended up having to take a couple of days off because at one point because Mario's dad flew in to see his son in the hospital.
Just a week ago, I went into work and was called into the office. The district manager came in and sat down and began talking to me. My background check came back with some issues that he wanted to address. I was told that there was a couple of items that showed up while GameStop was doing my background check. I knew immediately what they were talking about. For those of you that remember last summer back in July I got in trouble with a misdemeanor that ended up violating my probation that I was place on for cashing a bad check. Now, it was my understanding that when I appeared before Judge Case in Daytona that this matter was finished an over with. As a matter of fact I was sentenced to 60 days in Jail and upon completion was deemed non adjudicated. The district manager asked me for my side of the story, I explained it to him and was told that I needed to bring in the paperwork from the court showing the dispensation of the charges. I immediately called the public defenders office in Volusia County and within 15 minutes I was bringing them the paperwork that they had asked for.
The very first page showed the adjudication withheld status, but I was still told that I was going to be suspended till legal could look over the document and give the district manager their input as to whether or not the company was going to continue to utilize me. I was upset and frustrated by this decision because I think that it was totally unfair and with everything else that was happening in my life with my friend Travis's lover in the hospital I certainly felt that this was the worse possible timing that could have happened.
But the rub of the story is that I was off the entire weekend and when I was actually scheduled to work, and as I was getting ready to go back to work for the following Tuesday because I saw that my name was still on the schedule. I got a call from the store manager and was told that Spring Mobile had decided to part employment. I was very upset and sent a message to the district manager asking him to call me back and fill me in on the whole decision. He promptly returned my call, but explained that as far as he could tell from what the legal team was telling him was that I was incorrect in my assertion that adjudication was withheld. I was given a number to call and I called them immediately and launched an investigation and requested that more research be done on my behalf and asked for the decision be reversed.
I was told that the process would take about 2 weeks and that the employer would be notified, but here is what happened. I was removed from all the email and chat groups, and my work email was terminated immediately. I still haven't heard back from the investigator about what was happening with my request and here it is a week later and I am gainfully unemployed and have no real prospects of anything else.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you!
Uncle B
Showing posts with label trouble. Show all posts
Showing posts with label trouble. Show all posts
Saturday, August 18, 2018
Wednesday, January 17, 2018
Where does it go! Why so fast
They say "Easy Come, Easy Go", and I immediately think about my money. Getting paid once a month really sucks and usually by the 10th of the month I am totally flat broke. Especially when I was used to getting paid every other week and quite a bit more than I am making now. If it was just me that I was supporting my money would go a bit further I think. My income was never meant to support more than one person. But for three years I was doing considerably well.
But, then my relationship failed and my ex took off to Atlanta which threw me behind in every aspect of my life. I got behind on my electric, cable, rent and just about every other aspect of my life. I ended up losing my condo and from that moment forward I gave been struggling.
In December I finally got tired of struggling and made a move to try and correct that situation. At this point I have come to stay with a friend and his partner. I have taken control of my medical situation and have reached out to try and get myself established in Jacksonville. January has been a month of appointments trying to get the care I need and establish myself with the appropriate agencies that can help me and keep me off the streets.
Though this journey is just beginning I am hoping that they end result will bear the fruit that I need. But if January is going to be any guage as to how things are going to be then I maybe in trouble. Because before I knew what was happening my money was gone and the struggle has been real. Though my luck has turned around a bit with credit. I fear that it might cause me to drift back in the wrong direction financially. So this evening I started laying out a plan to get a budget in place that should help me plan a bit more towards saving money.
Further, by encouraging my partner to fill out and get food stamps will help with the food situation thus making February easier financially. This month was full of unexpected expenses that I shouldn't have next month. There were 3 trips to and from Daytona that I had not planned on or prepared for. With that being said I know that next month there will be trips back to handle legal business but after that things should go back to normal. I am not sure what the outcome of court is going to be but I am hoping that no matter what I will be able to start saving money so that I can finally get into a new place that has everything that I would like to have again.
Flying by the seat of your pants and not budgeting adequately can lead to living from paycheck to paycheck. This year it is my goal to get away from living that way. I fear that the next several months are going to be full of struggling to get to that point because I know that no matter how well you plan unexpected expenses crop up. Yet by May I hope to have created a buffer that will take care of those. But as with everything in life you have to start from square one and move forward.
I have never found a way to jump ahead and stay there. Because there is always something lurking around every corner that you haven't thought about or included in your original planning. When I was working full-time and I had money it was easy to over spend and live beyond my means. Then when I got sick, unplanned and unexpected, I was forced to leave the work force and depend on social security. This was definitely something that I wasn't used too and I still struggle with the amount that I currently make.
Though I do believe that I am finally getting the hang of things and becoming more comfortable with my means. I still find that my money goes out way faster then it comes in. Yet, with the proper help and support from my partner I think that it will become much easier in the future. I know in the past that we talked about money and finances, but apparently it was a lesson that I needed to learn all over again. Because here we are talking about it once again. The one thing to keep in mind is that if you have more withdrawals than deposits it is easy to go out of balance and negative. Therefore it is important to know what your expenses are and budget accordingly.
In my budget I am padding in a $100 buffer each month. This will be applied to savings and will add up rather quickly. This will I hope give me the opportunity to eventually replace the things there I have lost and give me the ability to fix some of the negative things that are affecting my credit at this moment.
In a couple of months hopefully I will be able to come back to you and report that "Easy Come, Easy Go" is no longer something that I fear. That I will be able to report to you I have stopped living from paycheck to paycheck and that I have been successful in saving money each month.
Here is my advice to you on a simple budget. Gather all your monthly bills and expenditures together from the previous month, pull out a notebook and at the top record your projected monthly income. From there it is simply enough to create a line item for each bill subtract it from your projected income and keep a running tally of what you have left after each line item. As you pay each bill go back to your budget and record your actual. Compare your projected and actual and keep track. This will also be useful to you when balancing your checkbook each month.
As I have noted some of my projected payments will not be as high as my actual so already I have created a buffer and will be able to save more in the long run or that is my hope and goal.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you. Laugh often, love much and live well.
Uncle B
Monday, January 2, 2017
Contemplations and decisions
2017 has already opened up a whole new group of contemplations and decisions for me to consider. My partner and I have been talking for several months about relocating out west.
On New Year's day I spoke to my friend in Washington state and talked to her about moving out there. I should be hearing something back from her tomorrow. My ex lives in Los Angeles California and has told me that I can move out there with him. So, here I sit wondering what I should do. Money is tight for me being paid just once a month, but my experience here in Daytona Beach has been less than stellar.
I have never lived in a place where so many people steal from one another. Even in Atlanta where people are constantly moving in and out because of job transfers have I experienced as many thieves. So even though I could probably get a new place here. I feel like life is pulling me in another direction.
Yesterday I was telling you about my partner losing his grandmother and that certainly is one thing that is weighing heavily on my mind. Another is my friend being arrested last night, I am staying with her mother and I really want to make sure that she is taken care of and not left without help or alone.
So what is a person supposed to do? Lord knows that I have my own health issues to think about as well as my own well being. Then, you have to add on my concern for my own parents that are in their 70's. My father is going to be fine my brother and step-mother will be there to take care of him. My my mother on the hand is not in the best of health. 2 years ago she lost the use of her legs and has become paralyzed from the waist down. She would love it if I came up to Pennsylvania to help take care her. The only problem with that is she wants me to come alone. But after almost 3 years being together I just can't up and leave my partner, especially when we aren't having problems.
Now, a couple of months ago when I was so sick and him and I were breaking up every other day it might have been an option for me. So what are my thoughts on this relocation plan? California is rather expensive compared to where I am living in Florida. But, having lived in Hollywood, I think that it would be some place I could see myself settling down in. But on the other hand I have heard that Seattle is a beautiful place and I have always wanted to go out there and see how it works for me and my health issues. The only drawback that I can see with that is I am no longer used to the cold. Seattle has a fall and winter that I have not had to experience since 2010 when I last stayed up in Pennsylvania. In 2014, I was in California and 2012 and 13 I was here in Florida. Now 2015 and 16 I was here as well. I am leaning towards Washington state if the truth be told. I know that it is clear across the country from where I am currently living but I believe that it is time for a change and I believe that the time is also right.
Change is in the air and after the year I had I am truly ready to get out of this area.
May your 2017 be filled with joy and laughter. I will keep you informed as to what my decision finally turns out to be. You will also notice that now that 2017 has come my tag line has changed.
As always you are in my hopes and dreams.
Live well, love much and laugh often.
Uncle B
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Pulling it together
You know every time you fall apart when a crisis comes your way or you hit a brick wall in your life. I want to talk to you about that today. See, emotions play a big factor in how we handle what life throws at us. I once told you that you are measured by the grace in which you rise from your problems or when you hit rock bottom. What I mean by this is that you are not judged by what you are gong through but how you handle the situation with grace and tact. It takes you 10 times longer to pull yourself together once you have fallen apart.
Now, you may be wondering what I am talking about when I say falling apart. Not everyone of us falls to pieces when trouble comes our way. However, as humans we have to factor in the emotional state of the person that is having the problem. See emotions play a significant part in how you handle a situation. How many times have I told you that you need to calm down, count to 100 or just divorce your feelings from the situation? A lot! It is not only important for you to tackle the problem clear headed and unemotional as it is for the others that you are dealing with.
I know that I used to hold my emotions in. I wouldn't tell anyone when I was upset. However, what was happening someone else would come along and do something so minor that it triggered an explosion from me. That's right little old me would blow up at the least little thing and what I found out was I was taking my anger, frustrations and guilt out on the wrong party. The person who was facing the brunt of my anger was not who I was truly angry with. This is what I am trying to help you avoid. Put te blame where the blame is due, don't hold anything in, take care of the situation as it happens and you will see how much better you feel. It took me a long time to be able to express how I am feeling, I am a person that doesn't like confrontations and I try to avoid them at all costs. However, it is in my best interest to let my feelings out when the issue arises because I don't want the wrong person to get my wrath when they didn't really do anything to deserve it.
I have told you before that you have to analyze a situation from every angle. Step outside of the box and look at the issue from a different perspective. I know it is hard to do, but if you can get past the emotional side of things and express your feelings either to yourself or to your partner and come at it with a clear head you will begin to see that the mountain you thought you were facing has many different options for getting past it. We all seem to take our personal problems and make them out to be bigger than they really are. I know that I do it. I take a molehill and make it a mountain when I am emotional about the situation, however once I calm down and start to think about the issue or problem with my rational thought and clear mind I begin to see the root of the problem and the many ways that I can fix or address it. But, it I come at it with my emotions raw and I am hurting, I just may say something or do something that I might regret later on. Remember it is not what you say but how you say it. Words have power they can cut, destroy and cause wounds that never heal. So be careful what you say, and keep in mind how biting and sharp your words are and how your tone and inflection might cause someone else pain. Your attitude plays a major role in this process.
Once I get out what I have to say, my mind reacts like nothing ever happened. I snap back to my up beat happy self like the issue was never there. I am one of the few people that can do that. If someone does something too me and I have an issue with it, if I address it right then and there and get out what I have to say about the problem, five or ten minutes later I am fine and have moved on like nothing ever happened. I know a lot of you aren't like that and it takes you a lot longer to get over something, you have some animosity and feel a certain way about the situation for a while. However, eventually you get over it and move on. Now, how do I accomplish this feat? It really isn't that complicated really. I just remember what I keep telling you that this too shall pass and I keep my head down and continue moving forward. It is the only thing I know to do, and I don't like having a burden or grudge so I get rid of it as quickly and efficiently as I can.
It important to take away from this that no matter what the situation is, if you can keep your emotions out of it and can tackle it with a rational mind and clear head you will find that you won't fall to pieces every time something bad comes your way. Remember it takes 10 times longer to pull yourself together when you fall apart. Emotions play a significant role in causing us to lose focus on the issue and tends to magnify it a thousand fold. Everything has it season and everything passes, you will survive and it will pass. Wait and see.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
Now, you may be wondering what I am talking about when I say falling apart. Not everyone of us falls to pieces when trouble comes our way. However, as humans we have to factor in the emotional state of the person that is having the problem. See emotions play a significant part in how you handle a situation. How many times have I told you that you need to calm down, count to 100 or just divorce your feelings from the situation? A lot! It is not only important for you to tackle the problem clear headed and unemotional as it is for the others that you are dealing with.
I know that I used to hold my emotions in. I wouldn't tell anyone when I was upset. However, what was happening someone else would come along and do something so minor that it triggered an explosion from me. That's right little old me would blow up at the least little thing and what I found out was I was taking my anger, frustrations and guilt out on the wrong party. The person who was facing the brunt of my anger was not who I was truly angry with. This is what I am trying to help you avoid. Put te blame where the blame is due, don't hold anything in, take care of the situation as it happens and you will see how much better you feel. It took me a long time to be able to express how I am feeling, I am a person that doesn't like confrontations and I try to avoid them at all costs. However, it is in my best interest to let my feelings out when the issue arises because I don't want the wrong person to get my wrath when they didn't really do anything to deserve it.
I have told you before that you have to analyze a situation from every angle. Step outside of the box and look at the issue from a different perspective. I know it is hard to do, but if you can get past the emotional side of things and express your feelings either to yourself or to your partner and come at it with a clear head you will begin to see that the mountain you thought you were facing has many different options for getting past it. We all seem to take our personal problems and make them out to be bigger than they really are. I know that I do it. I take a molehill and make it a mountain when I am emotional about the situation, however once I calm down and start to think about the issue or problem with my rational thought and clear mind I begin to see the root of the problem and the many ways that I can fix or address it. But, it I come at it with my emotions raw and I am hurting, I just may say something or do something that I might regret later on. Remember it is not what you say but how you say it. Words have power they can cut, destroy and cause wounds that never heal. So be careful what you say, and keep in mind how biting and sharp your words are and how your tone and inflection might cause someone else pain. Your attitude plays a major role in this process.
Once I get out what I have to say, my mind reacts like nothing ever happened. I snap back to my up beat happy self like the issue was never there. I am one of the few people that can do that. If someone does something too me and I have an issue with it, if I address it right then and there and get out what I have to say about the problem, five or ten minutes later I am fine and have moved on like nothing ever happened. I know a lot of you aren't like that and it takes you a lot longer to get over something, you have some animosity and feel a certain way about the situation for a while. However, eventually you get over it and move on. Now, how do I accomplish this feat? It really isn't that complicated really. I just remember what I keep telling you that this too shall pass and I keep my head down and continue moving forward. It is the only thing I know to do, and I don't like having a burden or grudge so I get rid of it as quickly and efficiently as I can.
It important to take away from this that no matter what the situation is, if you can keep your emotions out of it and can tackle it with a rational mind and clear head you will find that you won't fall to pieces every time something bad comes your way. Remember it takes 10 times longer to pull yourself together when you fall apart. Emotions play a significant role in causing us to lose focus on the issue and tends to magnify it a thousand fold. Everything has it season and everything passes, you will survive and it will pass. Wait and see.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
Sunday, February 22, 2015
The weight on my chest
They keep telling me that life is what you make of it. I have yet again taken a wrong turn and before I realized it I was back to where I started.
It is sad when you really like someone and they take advantage and end up pretty much just used you. You know it used to be that way in my life not to very long ago. There was always and excuse or false hood that had been concocted and I would allow myself to be dragged in.
Ulterior motives, hidden agendas, and pretty much the norm these days. This new generation feels that they have to hide what is really going on.
I am hurt, betrayed, angry, frustrated, and laughing and crying at the same time. Why not just tell me that you want to party and have some fun. Why put me through Atlanta all over again? Why do what he did?
I have learned my lesson, a true friend would not have encouraged me to stay off the drugs and walk away. However, the temptation was there and then it got so easy to take advantage, purchase, and even take extra money out of my account. All under the guise I know only too well "Lets go half, and I got you, don't worry, I am going to give the money back.'
I am not sure why you played with my heart, you should have just asked for the money. But, I take responsibility, I could have walked away anytime and come home. I chose to stay, because I thought I saw an honest and kind person. But as the weekend progressed, I heard things and realized that I never should have come down there. It was a set up from the get go.
Okay I accept that and now are letting go of all the animosity, hurt and pain that I am feeling. See the writing gets it out of my system. Now that I have written about this I am going to be fine emotionally that is, any other way I don't think you honestly give a crap about my health or well being.
I only stayed because my heart wanted to believe that I had met someone that truly liked me. But, the day that you hit me you told me I was ugly. Which only confirmed the other little comments that were said under your breathe. You knew what happened to me every time I went to Atlanta and you orchestrated it well, yet I stayed. I stayed because I think there were some sincere moments when the real you surfaced for just a minute, and that was the person I was trying to get too.
You knew the limitations I continually told you that I needed at least 700 in my account to keep the rent check from bouncing. Yet you manipulated me, told me you were going to take 40 out of my account yet when you came back you took 100 out of my account. I am not sure why you did it. Once again, if I would have been told the entire situation, I could have bought more stuff and saved some money. But here we are and I am sitting negative 500.00. That come on you know I got you. I am going half with you, everything is going to be alright. Guess what it isn't alright.
A real friend and someone that wants to get to know you. Would have been up front told you what the plans were and that drugs were going to be involved. Second they would have shown some interest in you which never happened.
What I find even more funny is that I was buying the sTuff, and I was shorted all weekend. You gave everyone more than me. I didn't say anything it was just drugs. But for you to actually get mad at me and punched me in the face and told me that I shorted and stole the sTuff, which was impossible it was mine to begin with I paid for it.
But, through everything that you did too me, I still turned around and picked you up and took you to your mom's house. I still wanted to be a friend and made sure you weren't stranded.
Damn if you were just a fraction of the man I thought you were and what you portrayed yourself to be while talking to me on the phone, I would have been happy.
How disappointing!
But I have to give credit where credit is due. My ex never, ever, hit me first off especially over drugs. Second him and I always made sure the the bills were paid first they were priority. Over and over I kept telling him that I didn't have the money and that my rent check still hadn't processed. He didn't care, just kept on pushing and nagging and wheedling and eventually I caved in. Now, I have to face the consequences of all of this alone.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
It is sad when you really like someone and they take advantage and end up pretty much just used you. You know it used to be that way in my life not to very long ago. There was always and excuse or false hood that had been concocted and I would allow myself to be dragged in.
Ulterior motives, hidden agendas, and pretty much the norm these days. This new generation feels that they have to hide what is really going on.
I am hurt, betrayed, angry, frustrated, and laughing and crying at the same time. Why not just tell me that you want to party and have some fun. Why put me through Atlanta all over again? Why do what he did?
I have learned my lesson, a true friend would not have encouraged me to stay off the drugs and walk away. However, the temptation was there and then it got so easy to take advantage, purchase, and even take extra money out of my account. All under the guise I know only too well "Lets go half, and I got you, don't worry, I am going to give the money back.'
I am not sure why you played with my heart, you should have just asked for the money. But, I take responsibility, I could have walked away anytime and come home. I chose to stay, because I thought I saw an honest and kind person. But as the weekend progressed, I heard things and realized that I never should have come down there. It was a set up from the get go.
Okay I accept that and now are letting go of all the animosity, hurt and pain that I am feeling. See the writing gets it out of my system. Now that I have written about this I am going to be fine emotionally that is, any other way I don't think you honestly give a crap about my health or well being.
I only stayed because my heart wanted to believe that I had met someone that truly liked me. But, the day that you hit me you told me I was ugly. Which only confirmed the other little comments that were said under your breathe. You knew what happened to me every time I went to Atlanta and you orchestrated it well, yet I stayed. I stayed because I think there were some sincere moments when the real you surfaced for just a minute, and that was the person I was trying to get too.
You knew the limitations I continually told you that I needed at least 700 in my account to keep the rent check from bouncing. Yet you manipulated me, told me you were going to take 40 out of my account yet when you came back you took 100 out of my account. I am not sure why you did it. Once again, if I would have been told the entire situation, I could have bought more stuff and saved some money. But here we are and I am sitting negative 500.00. That come on you know I got you. I am going half with you, everything is going to be alright. Guess what it isn't alright.
A real friend and someone that wants to get to know you. Would have been up front told you what the plans were and that drugs were going to be involved. Second they would have shown some interest in you which never happened.
What I find even more funny is that I was buying the sTuff, and I was shorted all weekend. You gave everyone more than me. I didn't say anything it was just drugs. But for you to actually get mad at me and punched me in the face and told me that I shorted and stole the sTuff, which was impossible it was mine to begin with I paid for it.
But, through everything that you did too me, I still turned around and picked you up and took you to your mom's house. I still wanted to be a friend and made sure you weren't stranded.
Damn if you were just a fraction of the man I thought you were and what you portrayed yourself to be while talking to me on the phone, I would have been happy.
How disappointing!
But I have to give credit where credit is due. My ex never, ever, hit me first off especially over drugs. Second him and I always made sure the the bills were paid first they were priority. Over and over I kept telling him that I didn't have the money and that my rent check still hadn't processed. He didn't care, just kept on pushing and nagging and wheedling and eventually I caved in. Now, I have to face the consequences of all of this alone.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
Sunday, November 4, 2012
A new understanding about unexpected happenings!
The other day we talked about coming through the storms that life throws our way. How to focus on the light and have faith that God is going to see us through. I also pointed out that when we least expect it how help comes from unexpected quarters, and when our strength falters it is God who carries us through. But on top of that I have learned something else. That with the bad comes the good in equal measure.
With that in mind I want to tell you a little story. It sort of goes hand in hand with the other two entries that I made on Friday. It is all about how I was so stressed because I hadn't listened correctly to what my landlord was saying. I heard something and got a little freaked out, thinking that he was changing the terms of our negotiation on the apartment and the deposits he wanted. Now because of my misunderstanding I caused myself unnecessary panic, anxiety and worry over absolutely nothing. When he came by to have me sign the lease we talked about everything and it all became clear that I had made a mistake by not hearing or listening closely enough to the words he had spoken on the phone. However, in my own defense when he called me Friday morning I was still in bed sound asleep, and may not have been fully awake. That doesn't lessen my guilt in this case.
But as I reported in my blog entry on the storm, God enabled my money to stretch just far enough so that all my bills would be covered with a little extra to spare. Keeping that in mind, this is what happened afterwards. I had been in a state of panic and dismay all day Friday, doubting that I would make it and praying for a solution. Which as I had indicated above was made, my money stretched just far enough that all the bills were covered and a tiny bit was left over. Now, I started worrying about what I was going to eat, and how was I going to have gas for the month, you know typical monthly expenses. Now, remember that I used the word DOUBT up above. God can only work with us if we are open and receptive to His will and His terms, right? You bet'cha, but this is what happened. In the midst of my worrying and doubting I forgot to pray about this other worry and problem. So Saturday morning I got up, was invited to my parents house for a cookout to meet my new stepbrother that is visiting from Ohio. I had already met with the landlord and my fears were laid to rest there, he went over the agreement with me, we discussed my financial ramifications and everything was satisfactory. I got to my parents house and was told that I had some mail in on the counter, went in to look at it and guess what I found?
Believe it or not, after all the worrying and doubting, answered prayer and the clearing of my own personal storm of my own making. There was an envelope there that was addressed to me from the United States Treasury department. Inside the envelope was a check for 100.10 for an over payment to the VA Administration for medication that I was billed for and paid. Apparently with my condition and financial situation I qualify for my healthcare through the VA without co-pays a this point till my income changes. So that little bit of money that I had increased enough to make it comfortable for me for the month. I have food in the refrigerator and cabinets, a half a tank of gas, and only spent 40.00 from what I had. That is when a new dawning hit me. See, God provides, even in times of doubt and worry, He has got our back and when we are faced with a storm, whether one of our own making or one of the many that life throws at us, we are going to be taken care of.
Further, for every bit of good that we receive we have to experience the same amount of bad. Which means for every bit of bad we survive and go through we are going to be rewarded with a little bit of goodness and fortune. I should have realized this it is call the Law of Opposites and has been known for hundreds of years. It took a simple little misunderstanding and a whole day of worrying and fretting to figure it out first hand and experience it. As I said when I opened this entry, that when we keep our eye on the light, or God while in the midst of a storm, we are going to be delivered through it and from an unexpected corner help is going to come when we least expect it or are looking for it.
I hope that each of you keep this in mind, because it really is something that you can trust and believe. Every time things get tough and I don't know how I am going to pull through a little miracle like that happens too me. Now my pastor says that I am highly blessed and favored and I believe it. But that doesn't mean I should shirk my responsibilities or forget that I need to thank God for each and every blessing, because if I did that my personal and intimate walk with Him would be hurt.
Things happen too us for a reason, sometimes those reasons are self-evident other times they are not. You have to understand where you are at and what you have been through to understand why you are going through what you are now. We learn from these storms, and trials and if we do it right we also grow from them and have a greater understanding of the world and the way things work. We are always rewarded for faithful service, and perseverance. We are never left to fend off things alone and that should renew our hope and faith.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
With that in mind I want to tell you a little story. It sort of goes hand in hand with the other two entries that I made on Friday. It is all about how I was so stressed because I hadn't listened correctly to what my landlord was saying. I heard something and got a little freaked out, thinking that he was changing the terms of our negotiation on the apartment and the deposits he wanted. Now because of my misunderstanding I caused myself unnecessary panic, anxiety and worry over absolutely nothing. When he came by to have me sign the lease we talked about everything and it all became clear that I had made a mistake by not hearing or listening closely enough to the words he had spoken on the phone. However, in my own defense when he called me Friday morning I was still in bed sound asleep, and may not have been fully awake. That doesn't lessen my guilt in this case.
But as I reported in my blog entry on the storm, God enabled my money to stretch just far enough so that all my bills would be covered with a little extra to spare. Keeping that in mind, this is what happened afterwards. I had been in a state of panic and dismay all day Friday, doubting that I would make it and praying for a solution. Which as I had indicated above was made, my money stretched just far enough that all the bills were covered and a tiny bit was left over. Now, I started worrying about what I was going to eat, and how was I going to have gas for the month, you know typical monthly expenses. Now, remember that I used the word DOUBT up above. God can only work with us if we are open and receptive to His will and His terms, right? You bet'cha, but this is what happened. In the midst of my worrying and doubting I forgot to pray about this other worry and problem. So Saturday morning I got up, was invited to my parents house for a cookout to meet my new stepbrother that is visiting from Ohio. I had already met with the landlord and my fears were laid to rest there, he went over the agreement with me, we discussed my financial ramifications and everything was satisfactory. I got to my parents house and was told that I had some mail in on the counter, went in to look at it and guess what I found?
Believe it or not, after all the worrying and doubting, answered prayer and the clearing of my own personal storm of my own making. There was an envelope there that was addressed to me from the United States Treasury department. Inside the envelope was a check for 100.10 for an over payment to the VA Administration for medication that I was billed for and paid. Apparently with my condition and financial situation I qualify for my healthcare through the VA without co-pays a this point till my income changes. So that little bit of money that I had increased enough to make it comfortable for me for the month. I have food in the refrigerator and cabinets, a half a tank of gas, and only spent 40.00 from what I had. That is when a new dawning hit me. See, God provides, even in times of doubt and worry, He has got our back and when we are faced with a storm, whether one of our own making or one of the many that life throws at us, we are going to be taken care of.
Further, for every bit of good that we receive we have to experience the same amount of bad. Which means for every bit of bad we survive and go through we are going to be rewarded with a little bit of goodness and fortune. I should have realized this it is call the Law of Opposites and has been known for hundreds of years. It took a simple little misunderstanding and a whole day of worrying and fretting to figure it out first hand and experience it. As I said when I opened this entry, that when we keep our eye on the light, or God while in the midst of a storm, we are going to be delivered through it and from an unexpected corner help is going to come when we least expect it or are looking for it.
I hope that each of you keep this in mind, because it really is something that you can trust and believe. Every time things get tough and I don't know how I am going to pull through a little miracle like that happens too me. Now my pastor says that I am highly blessed and favored and I believe it. But that doesn't mean I should shirk my responsibilities or forget that I need to thank God for each and every blessing, because if I did that my personal and intimate walk with Him would be hurt.
Things happen too us for a reason, sometimes those reasons are self-evident other times they are not. You have to understand where you are at and what you have been through to understand why you are going through what you are now. We learn from these storms, and trials and if we do it right we also grow from them and have a greater understanding of the world and the way things work. We are always rewarded for faithful service, and perseverance. We are never left to fend off things alone and that should renew our hope and faith.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Trouble comes around when you least expect it.
Today was a busy day for me I ran around trying to get my finances in order because I have a ticket to pay in Atlanta for my little excursion that turned out to be a nightmare. I had called the court last week and found out that the ticket was going to cost $194.40 for stopping in the road way. The officer was trying to find drugs in the car but since he couldn't do that he decided to give me a ticket anyway. Well, I got the money together because when I talked to the court last week they told me that I could pay it via the automated system. However tonight when I called the automated system it tells me that there are two tickets out there and that I needed to appear in court. So I went online to see if I could pay it via their website and what I found out is that there are two tickets issued one back in 2007 and then one I got in 2012. Now, the ticket in 2007 is not mine at all. The tag numbers don't match and the "party" field shows unknown. This is very frustrating for me because I finally got all my ducks in a row so that I could take care of this and get myself ahead of the game.
Keep in mind that when I got a hold of the clerk of the court in Atlanta, I was told that I specifically had to pay the ticket before my court date or they would suspend my license. I explained that I didn't live there and that there was no way that I could appear in court and I was trying to get an extension, she told me that I needed to write a letter to the judge asking for a reset of the court date because I couldn't appear. Now, I am not sure what I am supposed to do at this point, because even if I left now I would be stretching my finances so thin that I probably would end up getting stranded up there again. I cannot afford to have that happen, the last time I went up there I got stranded and my health suffered and I ended up in the hospital 4 times total. Honestly, I can't and don't want to go through all of that again. Even though a part of me would like to go up there and try and find my friend Tony, but I don't even have a clue where to look for him at the moment and I am not sure he would even come back with me if I did find him.
Besides which I have an appointment with the doctors tomorrow to discuss the referrals I need to see the GI specialist and neurologist. It seems that I am having a residual problem with my left leg from the drain that they removed from my back a week ago, when they went in and drained the cyst that had formed. I knew that Saturday when he pulled the drain out that he had hurt the nerve. I was told that it would bother me for a short period of time, but the pain has gotten a lot worse today. I am thinking that it is because of the weather. See I have had problems all my life when the barometric pressure drops because I had a fractured skull when I was born. Then when I was going through chemotherapy in the 90's they infiltrated the vein and the tissue on my right arm got damaged. It would turn black when the storms would come and I would get terrible migraines. Today a storm rolled in and my leg started hurting and my arm was sore as well, and on top of that I had a terrible migraine that lasted the whole day.
I wasn't prepared for having all of the pain on top of all the drama that has ensued. I even went by work today to pick up the check that they owed me for the deposit I paid to stay in the hotel that my company manages. I didn't stay there at all because last Friday they told me that I would have to pay a $200.00 deposit and I didn't have the extra money to come up with that. That was drama filled as well because just earlier on Friday I was told that I wouldn't have to pay a deposit because I worked for the company. I guess they knew that they were going to fire me on Friday, because the deal was there would be no deposit as long as I worked for them. In hindsight I guess I should have figured it out, but I was so excited about finally finding a place of my own that I could afford, and a person who was willing to work with me and knows my situation.
I have come to expect that when good things happen in my life they are always tempered with bad things. See this past weekend was so filled with blessings and good things that I should have known that bad things were just around the corner. However, there is no warning when bad things are looming. The good thing is this we are promised that we will never be given more than we can bear, God knows what our limitations are and will ensure that we have the strength to endure. Remember that every time a problem or crisis hits us there is a lesson somewhere in there to be learned. I want you to keep in mind that each of has our own trials and crisis's that we have bear it is how we rise up and deal with each of them that defines us and gives us the strength for the next one that is coming. Just like land storms come and go, they rage and blow, cause damage, but they always move on they never last forever. Problems are the same way. Remember that no problems is ever as permanent as the solution. How you look at the issue or situation also plays a major role in how long it will endure. I have told you over and over again that perception plays a vital part, and if we over analyze a situation too much we have a tendency to make it form a molehill into a mountain. Once it becomes a mountain, we fret and worry that there will be no way to surmount it. I am here to tell you that you can and will make it to the summit and down the other side. Keep on keeping on.
Have faith that when a storm of problems arise that there is something that you are supposed to be looking for a hidden lesson that you need to learn and grow from. This will keep you from dwelling on the actual event and keep your eyes looking forward, and your momentum will be steady. Before you know it you will have sailed right through to the other side of the issue and it has been resolved. I was talking to my best friend last night and was telling him this exact same thing. Nothing can hold us back if we just keep focus on the situations surroundings and deal with the issues as they arise. I call this plodding along, just keep putting one foot in front of the other and before you know it you will have made it through that issue or crisis and will be heading toward the next one. On Facebook I posted "It appears that I have entered the storm...Wonder what new direction God has planned for me now. A new adventure and journey lie beyond the storm. I can see a break in the clouds, ready boys weigh anchor, set sail and let's go...I am ready for this change." I am confident that I am going to get through this time. I can see a break in the clouds and I know that there is sun and warmth on the horizon.
As I have told you before we never know when trouble is going to pop up, we actually are given very little warning. The reason for this is that everything we have been through in the past is supposed to prepare us for what is coming next. Yet, there are times when something we have never experienced or encountered before creeps up on us and we are taken totally by surprise. We honestly have no idea how to approach or handle the situation. I believe this is the time when God will send us a person we need that will help us manage the problem. See I believe that every person that is brought into your life is there for a reason, some of the time we encounter someone who can teach us something that we don't know about ourselves or life. Other times there is someone that is brought into our lives because we are meant to teach them something. Whatever the case maybe keep your eyes and ears open, your help is already there and you just don't even know it yet. We are never thrown totally into a situation unprepared or where a way out hasn't been provided us. We just have to look around and change our perspective to see the answer and the solution or to find the one that was there to be our support through the problem.
Like I said everyone comes into our lives for a reason and are there for their allotted time before they move on. There is a third type of person that comes into our lives that may always be there. They are our confidants, our best friends, they can be our teacher sometimes, they can be our student sometimes as well, but they are always there as an ear to talk to a person to depend on and a shoulder to rest upon. These are the most precious of people in our lives and they form a very unique support network. They are going to be there with you through thick and thin and will always have your back. They are the ones you can trust and count on when everyone else has failed you. These are the ones that you must take care of and be sure that you nurture and tend to that friendship they are rare indeed.
As for my problems, they are minor, I know that I will make it through them with only a little of muss and fuss. I know that there has been some kind of mistake on the court's side in Atlanta and in the morning I will get it taken care of. As far as the job is concerned I will do whatever it is that I have to do to make it all work out. Nothing is impossible in this world if we only strive for perfection one day at a time. Keep that in mind and take it with you. You will see that what I am saying is the truth. But as I get ready to close this out I want to leave you with one thing more. I know I mentioned what seems like ages ago, but Salt n Pepa told us in a song, "Whatever the mind can conceive and believe you will achieve". With that I am going to say good night. Remember positive thoughts bring positive energy. Keep your chin up because this too shall pass! Like it always does and you are going to be that much stronger for it.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
Keep in mind that when I got a hold of the clerk of the court in Atlanta, I was told that I specifically had to pay the ticket before my court date or they would suspend my license. I explained that I didn't live there and that there was no way that I could appear in court and I was trying to get an extension, she told me that I needed to write a letter to the judge asking for a reset of the court date because I couldn't appear. Now, I am not sure what I am supposed to do at this point, because even if I left now I would be stretching my finances so thin that I probably would end up getting stranded up there again. I cannot afford to have that happen, the last time I went up there I got stranded and my health suffered and I ended up in the hospital 4 times total. Honestly, I can't and don't want to go through all of that again. Even though a part of me would like to go up there and try and find my friend Tony, but I don't even have a clue where to look for him at the moment and I am not sure he would even come back with me if I did find him.
Besides which I have an appointment with the doctors tomorrow to discuss the referrals I need to see the GI specialist and neurologist. It seems that I am having a residual problem with my left leg from the drain that they removed from my back a week ago, when they went in and drained the cyst that had formed. I knew that Saturday when he pulled the drain out that he had hurt the nerve. I was told that it would bother me for a short period of time, but the pain has gotten a lot worse today. I am thinking that it is because of the weather. See I have had problems all my life when the barometric pressure drops because I had a fractured skull when I was born. Then when I was going through chemotherapy in the 90's they infiltrated the vein and the tissue on my right arm got damaged. It would turn black when the storms would come and I would get terrible migraines. Today a storm rolled in and my leg started hurting and my arm was sore as well, and on top of that I had a terrible migraine that lasted the whole day.
I wasn't prepared for having all of the pain on top of all the drama that has ensued. I even went by work today to pick up the check that they owed me for the deposit I paid to stay in the hotel that my company manages. I didn't stay there at all because last Friday they told me that I would have to pay a $200.00 deposit and I didn't have the extra money to come up with that. That was drama filled as well because just earlier on Friday I was told that I wouldn't have to pay a deposit because I worked for the company. I guess they knew that they were going to fire me on Friday, because the deal was there would be no deposit as long as I worked for them. In hindsight I guess I should have figured it out, but I was so excited about finally finding a place of my own that I could afford, and a person who was willing to work with me and knows my situation.
I have come to expect that when good things happen in my life they are always tempered with bad things. See this past weekend was so filled with blessings and good things that I should have known that bad things were just around the corner. However, there is no warning when bad things are looming. The good thing is this we are promised that we will never be given more than we can bear, God knows what our limitations are and will ensure that we have the strength to endure. Remember that every time a problem or crisis hits us there is a lesson somewhere in there to be learned. I want you to keep in mind that each of has our own trials and crisis's that we have bear it is how we rise up and deal with each of them that defines us and gives us the strength for the next one that is coming. Just like land storms come and go, they rage and blow, cause damage, but they always move on they never last forever. Problems are the same way. Remember that no problems is ever as permanent as the solution. How you look at the issue or situation also plays a major role in how long it will endure. I have told you over and over again that perception plays a vital part, and if we over analyze a situation too much we have a tendency to make it form a molehill into a mountain. Once it becomes a mountain, we fret and worry that there will be no way to surmount it. I am here to tell you that you can and will make it to the summit and down the other side. Keep on keeping on.
Have faith that when a storm of problems arise that there is something that you are supposed to be looking for a hidden lesson that you need to learn and grow from. This will keep you from dwelling on the actual event and keep your eyes looking forward, and your momentum will be steady. Before you know it you will have sailed right through to the other side of the issue and it has been resolved. I was talking to my best friend last night and was telling him this exact same thing. Nothing can hold us back if we just keep focus on the situations surroundings and deal with the issues as they arise. I call this plodding along, just keep putting one foot in front of the other and before you know it you will have made it through that issue or crisis and will be heading toward the next one. On Facebook I posted "It appears that I have entered the storm...Wonder what new direction God has planned for me now. A new adventure and journey lie beyond the storm. I can see a break in the clouds, ready boys weigh anchor, set sail and let's go...I am ready for this change." I am confident that I am going to get through this time. I can see a break in the clouds and I know that there is sun and warmth on the horizon.
As I have told you before we never know when trouble is going to pop up, we actually are given very little warning. The reason for this is that everything we have been through in the past is supposed to prepare us for what is coming next. Yet, there are times when something we have never experienced or encountered before creeps up on us and we are taken totally by surprise. We honestly have no idea how to approach or handle the situation. I believe this is the time when God will send us a person we need that will help us manage the problem. See I believe that every person that is brought into your life is there for a reason, some of the time we encounter someone who can teach us something that we don't know about ourselves or life. Other times there is someone that is brought into our lives because we are meant to teach them something. Whatever the case maybe keep your eyes and ears open, your help is already there and you just don't even know it yet. We are never thrown totally into a situation unprepared or where a way out hasn't been provided us. We just have to look around and change our perspective to see the answer and the solution or to find the one that was there to be our support through the problem.
Like I said everyone comes into our lives for a reason and are there for their allotted time before they move on. There is a third type of person that comes into our lives that may always be there. They are our confidants, our best friends, they can be our teacher sometimes, they can be our student sometimes as well, but they are always there as an ear to talk to a person to depend on and a shoulder to rest upon. These are the most precious of people in our lives and they form a very unique support network. They are going to be there with you through thick and thin and will always have your back. They are the ones you can trust and count on when everyone else has failed you. These are the ones that you must take care of and be sure that you nurture and tend to that friendship they are rare indeed.
As for my problems, they are minor, I know that I will make it through them with only a little of muss and fuss. I know that there has been some kind of mistake on the court's side in Atlanta and in the morning I will get it taken care of. As far as the job is concerned I will do whatever it is that I have to do to make it all work out. Nothing is impossible in this world if we only strive for perfection one day at a time. Keep that in mind and take it with you. You will see that what I am saying is the truth. But as I get ready to close this out I want to leave you with one thing more. I know I mentioned what seems like ages ago, but Salt n Pepa told us in a song, "Whatever the mind can conceive and believe you will achieve". With that I am going to say good night. Remember positive thoughts bring positive energy. Keep your chin up because this too shall pass! Like it always does and you are going to be that much stronger for it.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
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