Friday, August 17, 2012

It is never to late to learn something new about ourselves

A good friend of mine posted on his Facebook page this today:

 "If I could change one thing from my past I would live life to the fullest and be reborn. Meaning I would give my all. I would snatched the shirt off my back to give to a homeless person in need . I would refrain from being selfish ( as I once was). And furthermore I would rewrite many misconceptions that others had about the true ME!

THEY WILL NEVER KNOW THE REAL ME !!!!!"

I will be honest this got me to really think about life and living and the past from the present.  I love it when I can find inspiration from something someone else has learned or discovered about themselves.  I am sure by now you are all familiar with my poem called "Frienemies" and if your aren't then I suggest you go read it.  Because it talks all about those that are close to you and claim to be your friend but are talking shit about you behind your back and doing everything they can to undermine you and your life.  Now, as I have said the person who wrote this is a very good friend of mine and someone I have known for the past two years, and I can tell you that the person he is today is not the person that he was when I met him.  He is kind and considerate now, where before the world revolved around him, and he was all about what you could do for him.  Now, as you can imagine we are the polar opposites, I am the one who had the kind heart, the giving nature, and struggled to get past those misconceptions he talks about in his post.  Because, unlike most people I am not the type that is going to be scared away easily, I look at a person and I see their soul, I see their potential and if there is something there that I like I stick it out.  Now, I can tell you that we weren't always close, that his way of dealing with things was not mine, and vice versa.  But I can tell you this, that as this post shows it is never too late to learn something about yourself and make a change.

My blog has been from the very beginning about the inward journey one must take to reach enlightenment, it addresses the daily concerns of living and gives real world examples on how to overcome and avoid life's little obstacles that fall in our way.  I applaud my friend for his self realization that he was self-centered, egotistical, and selfish, however I can say that my experience with him has always been a different kind.  He didn't treat me like he did others, and maybe it was because I was as different from him as he was from me, but it seemed that our friendship grew very quickly to becoming very close.  I learned a lot from him, how to spot when people are taking advantage of me, and how to handle myself in just about any situation, that I didn't have to avoid confrontation.  I am not sure if he learned anything from me yet, but that is okay.  Because like I said in a couple of my earlier blogs, that each and every person comes into our lives for a reason, a specific purpose.  I also believe that there are 3 types of people that are constantly in our lives.  These are Teachers, Students, and Confidants, depending on the situation and need you find yourself in, is where you find which role you are playing at any given point.  I know from first hand experience that at times I have been the teacher, and have helped lots of people in my life and taught them how to take care of themselves and love themselves and how to be a better person.  But I have also been a student and have learned from others. As for the confidant role you can be that for anyone, I know that they are rare and when you have found yours hang on to them.  

A confidant is someone you consider to be your best friend, it is who you talk to the most, confide in, you talk all the time, they are there for you and you are there for them no matter what the circumstance.  They are there to help you pick up the pieces of your shattered heart when your relationships go south, they are who you lean on when the world has turned upside and you are lost and don't know where to turn.  You do the same for them.  I have a best friend that I have known since High School, we talk every day, and it is neat!  Now, there have been times when we didn't talk, when we had issues with each other and gone our separate ways, but somehow, we manage to always get past those times and come back together.  A confidant is someone that you need to have in your life, they are the holders of your secrets and you theirs.

The reason why I re-posted my friends Facebook post here is because I wanted to use it to bring home a point.  The point is this, we are never to old to learn something new about ourselves.  It is never too late to make a conscious change and better ourselves.  Inner reflection is the key to changing the way you view yourself, and when your perspective changes, so does your outlook on life and everything that happens around you.  His post strikes a cord in my heart, and makes me excited that his view and perception of himself is changing and that he has the desire to become a different and better Him than he was.  But as in all things if you look hard enough there is a lesson here to be found as well.  This being that of rewriting the misconceptions about the real person.  What I know and he will learn is that there is nothing we can do with how a person perceives us, the only true way to dispel misconceptions about who we are or were is by fighting through them and getting to know the real person behind them.  However, I know exactly how difficult that can be.  Yet, no matter what you do people are still going to have preconceived notions about who your are and what you represent.  They are going to feed off of the misconceptions that have been presented them, and before you know it your are built up to be something you totally aren't.

As in my friends case here wishing he could go back and re-write them is a noble sentiment, but that is just that! He has changed his focus, realized where he needed to change and has done so.  That alone is what is going to make the difference going forward.  What has happened in the past is in the past and cannot be undone or changed. All we have is what is before us, and if you truly want to make yourself a better more likeable person, you are just going to have to do it.  Remember that actions speak louder than words, and deeds that prove will last a lifetime and be a testament to your change.

What I want you to take away from here tonight is this.  We are all on a journey, it is a spiritual journey, a journey of awakening, a journey of self-discovery and learning.  We need to take each encounter that we have and find the lesson within it.  Because, there is a lesson to be learned around every corner.  As we travel forward on this road change your focus from outward gratification and pleasure and turn it inward toward understanding and self-awareness.  Once you have changed the perspective at which you view life and your journey you are going to see things you never even thought existed, more blessing are going to come your way, but as we change our focus, we must also release the past.  The past is a guide, a learning tool, something to look back on to correct our footing on the path, but nothing more.  You must keep in mind that the past is immutable, unchangeable, and can keep you prisoner.  Because how can you move forward if you are looking to the past, clinging to the baggage that needs to be surrendered and released?  And as you move along your journey there are going to be those that you have to leave behind because they aren't doing you any good, they are holding you back and trying to shift your focus in their direction.  Once you have cut them free and let them go new people will enter your life that will help you on your way.  Open your heart be in awe of the world and life around you. Revel in the majesty, mystery and beauty of God and the world.  Know in your heart that everything you do is for a reason, and is something to learn and grow by.  We are the sum of all the decisions and actions we choose.  Choose to live, choose to follow me and take the road less traveled.  Look deep within your self, you will find the answers are there waiting for you.  Don't worry what others think because in the long run their opinions aren't going to matter at all.  The life you lead is yours.  Embrace it openly and lovingly savor every single moment. Rejoice in the here and now, and as you move forward and better yourself, don't be surprised that everyone else is going to see and notice those changes.

Live well, love hard, be open, be safe, and walk with eyes of awe and wonder, enjoy everything around you to the fullest. Because as you know time is fleeting and if we don't take the opportunity to enjoy it before you know it life has already passed you by.

As always my hopes and dreams are with you,

Uncle B