Saturday, January 17, 2015

Words are just words without any action to support them?

What I mean by this is you tell me something that you want me to believe you need to have performed some kind of action to support the deed that you are telling me about.  It is so easy for us to lie to ourselves and even easier to lie to one another. Take it a different way, you tell me exactly what you think I want to hear and I am suppose to believe you on the basis of your statement.  However, how can I believe what you are telling me when I know you.  I have been around you and I know your actions and reactions to certain situations.  As a friend we learn each others habits, tricks and faces, and when someone tries to get over on you, The first thing that comes to mind is it's all a lie.

The phrase keeps coming to mind "Actions speak louder than words" and that is a universal truth.  The Bible even states that God helps those that helps themselves.  In order for us to show our sincerity we have to be able to show actionable proof that we did something, that we accomplished something and that we aren't just full of bull.  I know it is so easy to fall into a pattern of telling others what we think they want to hear, but we are just fooling ourselves, the other person knows we are full of it and that we didn't  do what we are claiming.

It is so important more now than ever to be true to yourself. By this I mean you have to be brutally honest with yourself. You have to practice every day speaking the truth and only the truth.  If you can master that then you are on the right track.  Your deeds and your words will reflect one another and you become a person of integrity.  See integrity is something that is so important today, money is scarce, jobs are hard to find and we are all struggling in some way or another. If you are a person of integrity you live as you preach. You are a man or woman of your word.  Nothing can persuade you from that path.  It is important for others to know that they can trust and count on you and that is the other part of integrity.

So let me break this down to you. Integrity is practicing what we preach, being 100 percent honest with ourselves and others, as well as being someone that another person can count on and trust in. There are too many people out there that are living in half truths and lies and they are expecting the rest of the world to believe them and the lies that they are selling. These are the people that you need to avoid and keep out of your life.  You are here to make a change. To be better than you were and are, and in order to do this you must remain positive, faithful and truthful.  The old adage is 100 percent dead on when they say " The Truth Shall Set You Free ".  Try it I am sure you are going to get used to it.

That's right I believe that each and everyone of us needs to work on this issue. That we need to train ourselves and make ourselves be truthful not only to others but to ourselves as well.  It is the nature of a man to tell a lie than to risk hurting another's feelings.  I know this to be true because I catch myself at this all the time and I have to remember. That I would rather someone be 100 percent honest to my face and give me 15 minutes of pain, than for me to find out the truth from someone else the truth, because my pain is going to be so much worse having to find out the truth from another source.  My trust will be broken with you and once trust is broken it is so hard to build back.

What am I trying to ell you in this entry? Exactly what I said at the beginning words are just words.  Words can be used for communication, they can be used to build someone or something up, they can be used to hurt, maim or injure another.  But, words are just that without any action behind them. As I have told you before, the worst wounds that another can inflict are wounds caused by words.  Words that are spoken in anger, haste, or to tear down or degrade another person are words that cause wounds that will never heal.  Trust will be lost, hope, faith, and even self-confidence can be ultimately destroyed by the words another inflicts upon you.

Yet, I have been saying that words without action are just words and that is true. However, using words to wound are words in action, you are openly telling someone something about another, or you are taking something that was given to you in trust and throwing back at the person who entrusted you and that is both deed and action combined.  Why am I telling you this? Is this something that is important?  I believe it is!  Unintentionally I believe that someone has maligned my character, said stuff about me to get others to think about me a certain way.  Now they know that they are lying  but again they are trying to please another so they say hurtful and untruthful things.

An example of this recently came into my life through a bitter conversation with another person. This person claimed that because of my illness and surgeries that my anus was sown shut and that I couldn't have sex that way,  Now I know that this was said to hurt me and make me feel bad about myself, but here is the rub. I don't have to respond or acknowledge that attack because I know and understand the truth of the situation.  However, for arguments sake I will clarify my situation.  In the past I have had a bowel resection this is where a part of the intestine is removed the two remaining parts are then fused back together.  This causes a stricture or a narrowing of the walls,  Over time this narrowing becomes harder to relax and open because of scare tissue.  So the truth of the matter is this I can have sex that way.  But in order to relax those muscles sufficiently takes time and effort.  It is not impossible at all. So you see where I am going with this?  The attack on me was unfounded and was not grounded in truth, so I didn't get angry at the situation, but I knew where the faulty information came from immediately and it saddened me that they had to lie about me to make themselves feel better about themselves.

When ever someone comes at you with words, take a few minutes before responding and actually think about your response, you will find that if you do this, it will unbalance the conversation and it will allow you to reveal the truth and your actions and words will demonstrate union where the other person will not be able substantiate what they have said.

Be careful with words, especially around children.  Words are powerful and can do great things or cause great harm.  Always remember that if you are true to yourself and honest with yourself you will be the same with everyone else.

As always my hopes and dreams are with you,

-Uncle B