You can smell in on the night breeze that wafts through the window, the warm days and cool nights as winter looses it hold on the world. It is on those warm night breezes that hope springs forth like the new growth of the plants outside.
Spring is a time of hope, a time of renewal and joy. It is when nature comes back to life after it's winter hibernation. You can smell fresh smell of growth as the breeze filters through the screen door and out my window.
As the winter snows recede and new life breaks through the fertile earth, the daffodils grow lean and tall and as their blossom open to the new days sun. It is the symbol that spring has finally come. I remember watching as the stalks of the daffodils broke through the earth and i knew that winter was finally over.
It doesn't matter whether the groundhog had seen it's shadow or not, time waits for no one and the earth rotation continues ever onward. The long winter nights are over and the days start to stretch ever longer.
Take hope in the new spring as it grows all around you. For it is easy to believe that everything is good and right in the world as the new foliage spring forth from the ground. Feel that warm spring breeze as if flies through your window, smell the flowers as the new leaves sprout on trees.
It is the rain of spring that brings new life and the fertile earth gives new birth. Enjoy the weather for the calm days of spring bring in the harsh warmth of summer. Rain is scarce during the summer but so abundant in the spring.
I believe in the spring comes hope and joy. I hope that you find it this season. Because before you know it the world will have rotated and summer will be upon you. Take with you the hope that spring gives you and use it throughout the year. Beware that the heat of summer will try and drain the hope you have gained. You can weather this just as autumn like spring it has cool nights and warm days.
Autumn and Spring complete a cycle of life, birth, growth and aging and death. The seasons represent our lives and how we should live. Remember that winter won't last forever and spring will come again. It is the hope that new life will be born in the world that keeps you alive and well throughout the fall and winter. Summer is the harsh reality of it all the stark sun drying the earth and withering the growth, it is during this time that growth is completed.
Take hope in the spring and make it last the whole year through. Remember the warm days and cool nights because they come twice a year for you to signal the change of life to death. Warm days in the spring and cool nights they come again in the autumn those same warm days and cool nights.
Remember I believe in you always. Take heart in the new birth and growth that spring is about to bring you. Learn to live your life in the moment and enjoy the seasons as they come.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B.
Showing posts with label birth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label birth. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Halloween, My Favorite Time of Year
The autumn nights are cooler and there is usually a nice breeze to accompany the All Hallow's Eve parties, loud music and kids going door to door trick-or-treating. Tonight I am looking out my window at the world passing me by and wondering what am I doing here. See, usually on Halloween I am with my best friend Jason it is his birthday. Back in Atlanta there are tons of parties to go to and of course I know everybody. To be honest this is the first Halloween in years that I haven't dressed up and done something cool with my friend. I have several other friends that have their birthday on this very night, it has been a long time since I got to spend the holiday with them. But I will never forget how I met James and his brother Jason that are born on October 31st. I had gone to Dallas to hang with another best friend that lived with me in Florida. We all got dressed up and went to this huge party and I had a blast. I fell in love with Dallas that very night and have been back a few times since then. The great thing is that after all these years I have still kept in touch with James and Jason a great pair of guys, totally opposites for twins, but really cool to hang out with. I also have another friend named Tony that lives in Atlanta and today is also his birthday. So I guess tonight you could say that I am feeling rather homesick and that I wish I was there with my friends to celebrate and have a good time.
Tonight it is cool here on Daytona Beach but there is a full moon that I am watching as I type this. I am wondering what all of my friends are up too. I wonder if they know how much I miss each one of them, and how I am thinking about them on this very night. How I am hoping and praying that whatever they are doing that they are safe and having a great time. But I also have another wish for all of my friends that I mentioned above, I hope they all find and hold on to the love that is looking desperately to find them, and that their whole year is blessed with Joy and Laughter. Life is too short for all the stress and angst the world wants to through at us. It helps to swallow the bitter with a bit of humor if you ask me. But my wish is also that they find success in their endeavors and fortune in love and be surrounded by friends and loved ones that are supportive of their choices and opinions. Each of us needs to have a network to fall back on, and we need that group to be unconditional in the support of our endeavors, our goals and will be willing to help us reach our dreams.
Halloween is symbolic of many things. They say that the veil between the world's thin and that it is a night that the dead can come back to life, or commune with the living. But it also the end of a season and heralds a time of renewing and rebirth. See it is the autumn that is the time when life has shut down and it goes dormant for a period, regains strength and purpose, so that when spring returns it can burst forth with fresh growth and new life. It is a time of renewal and regeneration. To let go of the past and move forward. Of course it is also a night that kids around the world get to go out in costume and get candy. But it is time for winding down in the world. Even in Corporate and State business it is a time of winding down. Budgets are coming to a close and executives are diligently trying to get the new years budgets done and submitted for approval. It is also the coming of the holidays, for the next several months there are many holidays Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. So even the mighty corporations and conglomerates are showing signs of slowing down. Funny how we humans mimic the cycles of nature and follow the rest and hibernating cycles of the earth.
But the reason why it is my favorite holiday and time of year is because it is a juxtaposition, summer has begun to leave us, and autumn hasn't fully gotten it's hold on the world yet, the leaves are exploding in vibrant colors and are still on the trees, and the colder temperatures haven't exactly crept upon us and robbed us of the warmth. The days are still warm and the nights cool, and it is a time of festivity and revelry. It is time when we can get out and dress up and be something that we normally aren't. It is a time when we can actually be 100 percent honest to the true self that resides in each of us. With our masks on and costumes we can cut up and be the carefree spirits we were meant to be. Instead of the dull suits that work in the office Monday thru Friday, or the school teach stuck in a classroom 9 hours a day, or the bus driver that doesn't say a word unless spoken too or incident occurs. It is a time when we can reach out an explore the side of ourselves that we keep repressed and hidden from the world to see. It is also a time of celebration and gathering with friends to have parties and spend some time with others.
So what are you doing this very Halloween Night? I know that I am sitting here writing to you, because unfortunately as I stated above, I am home sick, lonely and on top of that I am really not feeling all that well. But my well wishes go out to my friends and the ones I love whose very special day it is and who I am unable to spend my time with. I hope that they are all safe and having a great night. I do know that at least one of them is at home celebrating alone...So from my heart to yours..enjoy that glass of wine and know that I was thinking about you and sending you my warmest wishes and best hopes.
I love everyone of you guys...I love you my readers and friends and I hope that you begin to enjoy Halloween like I have for the past 20 years. Get out there and experience life. Because the cycle of hibernation and rest is about to befall you...it is the last fun time you have before the drudgery of the holidays and endless lines of bickering people in the stores. Take the time now, because you aren't going to get it later.
Happy Halloween to All! Happy Birthday James, Jason, Jason (Sa'corey), and Tony! Have a great night and a glorious rest of the week and a most Excellent year!
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
Tonight it is cool here on Daytona Beach but there is a full moon that I am watching as I type this. I am wondering what all of my friends are up too. I wonder if they know how much I miss each one of them, and how I am thinking about them on this very night. How I am hoping and praying that whatever they are doing that they are safe and having a great time. But I also have another wish for all of my friends that I mentioned above, I hope they all find and hold on to the love that is looking desperately to find them, and that their whole year is blessed with Joy and Laughter. Life is too short for all the stress and angst the world wants to through at us. It helps to swallow the bitter with a bit of humor if you ask me. But my wish is also that they find success in their endeavors and fortune in love and be surrounded by friends and loved ones that are supportive of their choices and opinions. Each of us needs to have a network to fall back on, and we need that group to be unconditional in the support of our endeavors, our goals and will be willing to help us reach our dreams.
Halloween is symbolic of many things. They say that the veil between the world's thin and that it is a night that the dead can come back to life, or commune with the living. But it also the end of a season and heralds a time of renewing and rebirth. See it is the autumn that is the time when life has shut down and it goes dormant for a period, regains strength and purpose, so that when spring returns it can burst forth with fresh growth and new life. It is a time of renewal and regeneration. To let go of the past and move forward. Of course it is also a night that kids around the world get to go out in costume and get candy. But it is time for winding down in the world. Even in Corporate and State business it is a time of winding down. Budgets are coming to a close and executives are diligently trying to get the new years budgets done and submitted for approval. It is also the coming of the holidays, for the next several months there are many holidays Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. So even the mighty corporations and conglomerates are showing signs of slowing down. Funny how we humans mimic the cycles of nature and follow the rest and hibernating cycles of the earth.
But the reason why it is my favorite holiday and time of year is because it is a juxtaposition, summer has begun to leave us, and autumn hasn't fully gotten it's hold on the world yet, the leaves are exploding in vibrant colors and are still on the trees, and the colder temperatures haven't exactly crept upon us and robbed us of the warmth. The days are still warm and the nights cool, and it is a time of festivity and revelry. It is time when we can get out and dress up and be something that we normally aren't. It is a time when we can actually be 100 percent honest to the true self that resides in each of us. With our masks on and costumes we can cut up and be the carefree spirits we were meant to be. Instead of the dull suits that work in the office Monday thru Friday, or the school teach stuck in a classroom 9 hours a day, or the bus driver that doesn't say a word unless spoken too or incident occurs. It is a time when we can reach out an explore the side of ourselves that we keep repressed and hidden from the world to see. It is also a time of celebration and gathering with friends to have parties and spend some time with others.
So what are you doing this very Halloween Night? I know that I am sitting here writing to you, because unfortunately as I stated above, I am home sick, lonely and on top of that I am really not feeling all that well. But my well wishes go out to my friends and the ones I love whose very special day it is and who I am unable to spend my time with. I hope that they are all safe and having a great night. I do know that at least one of them is at home celebrating alone...So from my heart to yours..enjoy that glass of wine and know that I was thinking about you and sending you my warmest wishes and best hopes.
I love everyone of you guys...I love you my readers and friends and I hope that you begin to enjoy Halloween like I have for the past 20 years. Get out there and experience life. Because the cycle of hibernation and rest is about to befall you...it is the last fun time you have before the drudgery of the holidays and endless lines of bickering people in the stores. Take the time now, because you aren't going to get it later.
Happy Halloween to All! Happy Birthday James, Jason, Jason (Sa'corey), and Tony! Have a great night and a glorious rest of the week and a most Excellent year!
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Bisexuality....My take on the subject
I honestly don't think many people like to be labeled one thing or another, but I was thinking about bisexuality the other day and it began to dawn on me that we are all born bisexual. It is only after we start to form bonds with others that it becomes evident that we are part of one group or another. It seems to me that as we grow and mature, the attraction between one sex or the other starts to outweigh one another. For example in elementary school and middle school I was attracted to both guys and girls, in high school I still dated girls, but it was here that I finally started to be attracted to guys more than girls, and then after high school when I was in the Navy and away from home, I was finally able to explore my sexuality and come to terms with who I was.
Experimentation is a part of everyone's life. I am sure everybody has a story that they could tell you about a friend that they played around with and so forth. It is only when we feel that we bond easier with one sex over the other that we realize or begin to identify with that sexual group. Some people never get out of that stage and enjoy the company of both sexes. People in this category don't necessarily find it harder or easier to bond with male or female, honestly they feel comfortable bonding with either/or depending on the person. In this entry I am going to use the term "homosexual" or "gay" to describe both male and female attraction to the same sex. It will make it that much easier for conversation sake.
Homosexuality has been around as long as man has been on the earth. In ancient times it wasn't as taboo or frowned upon as it is today. There were less stigmas associated with the behavior, and you were free to engage in either same-sex or opposite-sex at your leisure. Bisexuality was probably pretty prevalent in those times. Men and women were more understanding and shared their partners more readily then we do today. Our culture doesn't encourage multiple partners or mates, unless you were part of the old Mormon Faith that believed in polygamy, or still follow more ancient forms of religion like paganism. In countries that practice Buddhism they may take more than one mate because a marriage in their religion is not a sacrament and is considered purely a secular affair. If you find yourself attracted to members of the same sex as well as those of the opposite sex, I encourage you to expand your horizons and actually indulge in those attractions, explore the feelings and intimacy that both offer.
Don't be afraid, empower yourself to seek and discover the benefits of both. You don't have to label yourself as one or the other, be open minded and explore. Youth is meant for taking chances, exploring hidden pleasures and choosing a direction for your life. While you are experiencing and opening yourself up to life and all it's pleasures you are going to begin to feel which group you form closer attachments to and who you feel more comfortable with. As I have said over and over again in other blog entries, experiment and think outside the box, above all else keep an open mind and enjoy the pleasure and sensations you are feeling. Release the feelings of guilt, that are fostered on you by religion and societal pressures there is nothing wrong with what you are doing, and everyone has tried it in some form or fashion at least once in their lives. Some believe that if you are gay or bisexual that you have chosen this path, and I can tell you, I for one did not make a conscious decision to be gay. I can tell you that over time I felt I could bond and understand males more than females. I felt more comfortable being with males and I felt closer to them than I did females. As I have told you I dated both for a long time, and over time the affinity I felt for males begun to outweigh what I felt for females. Most of my best friends are females, I feel a kinship to them, I think because we have similar interests and habits. I can also tell you this, if I would have been able to make a choice, I would never have chosen the course that I am on.
Gay relationships are harder than straight ones, and have their own internal pressure as well as the pressure from outside. All because society's views are that of being closed minded and repressive. We are taught that it is wrong to care for someone of the same sex, and it is preached against in the church and so forth. We have to deal with all those pressures, as well as the ridicule and hate that are spawned by those teachings. Which is why some people choose to hide their sexuality and live dual lives and hide behind lies. By doing such they carry a tremendous amount of pressure and guilt upon their shoulders. For a better picture of what I am talking about above I suggest that you read my entry on "Coming out a tale of fear" I talk about some of the same things in it. Societal norms and pressure put on today's youth about their sexuality and preference is extremely prejudicial and makes it hard for them to deal with the feelings that they feel inside of them, and with those feelings, comes fear of discover, fear of being different, fear of not being excepted, fear of being ridiculed and the total fear that everyone they know will abandon them. Trust me coming to terms with your own sexuality is one of the hardest things you are going to have to do. But as I have stated I am a firm believer that this is not a personal choice we are born the way we are and we gravitate and feel a connection with one or the opposite sex as we develop and mature more. The group we eventually align with or are drawn to is dependent solely on which group we feel more closely connected to and bond easier with.
When we are conceived without gender, the gender assignment doesn't happen till the 13th week of pregnancy or after. Hormones present in the amniotic fluid help the embryo develop into a male or female fetus. The hormone for males is testosterone and estrogen for the females. but up until the 16th week of pregnancy the developing genitalia are identical apart from the hormone that is present in the maternal system, which helps identify what sex the baby is going to be when born. So from conception till week 16 both the male and female zygote, embryo to fetus transition happens exactly the same, there is no way to determine what gender they are going to be, except by testing the hormone levels, and depending on the mother's hormone levels this too could be misleading. A woman with high levels of testosterone would give an abnormal reading at first as would a woman with the reverse, high levels of estrogen. In some rare cases human children have been born of both sexes. Having developed male and female genitalia. Again, this research just goes to prove that we are of both sexes till some point in the maturation process within the womb, therefore it is probable that bisexuality is a natural condition for us humans, and that we let society and religion taint it and make it wrong.
What you should come away with from here is that you shouldn't be afraid to explore your own sexuality, and should feel comfortable with what you do. There is no shame in experimentation and discovering for yourself what feels enjoyable. Don't let society pressure you into a role that you are uncomfortable with. There is no shame in remaining bisexual, maybe you find sex with both sexes extremely pleasurable. I see nothing wrong in that at all. Most of us, if not all have experimented. Some like me have found that we bond and attach more easily to men, over time the attraction toward men becomes stronger and we identify ourselves as being gay. However, others will find that the attraction to the opposite sex grows stronger as the grow and mature so they associate themselves with being heterosexual or straight. Though there are those that can label themselves anyway they want and still find beauty in both sexes. I know I do, though I openly consider myself gay, I still find some women very attractive and talk to them. Of course, I catch myself looking at men too and finding them attractive.
A word of caution don't let other people tell you what you are and what you are supposed to be. You are you and only you can decide what is going to make you happy. I have known so many men that have stayed in the closet and gotten married and had children who continue to play with members of the same sex behind their spouses back. I have even know a few that decided well into their marriage that they couldn't stand to live with the lies and deceptions any longer so they tell their family. Everyone gets hurt in that scenario. I ask you to be brutally honest with yourself and those around you. Don't let a lie destroy you and hurt the people you care about, and be sure you are ready to make a commitment before you jump into something. Again I suggest you try it before you knock it.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
Experimentation is a part of everyone's life. I am sure everybody has a story that they could tell you about a friend that they played around with and so forth. It is only when we feel that we bond easier with one sex over the other that we realize or begin to identify with that sexual group. Some people never get out of that stage and enjoy the company of both sexes. People in this category don't necessarily find it harder or easier to bond with male or female, honestly they feel comfortable bonding with either/or depending on the person. In this entry I am going to use the term "homosexual" or "gay" to describe both male and female attraction to the same sex. It will make it that much easier for conversation sake.
Homosexuality has been around as long as man has been on the earth. In ancient times it wasn't as taboo or frowned upon as it is today. There were less stigmas associated with the behavior, and you were free to engage in either same-sex or opposite-sex at your leisure. Bisexuality was probably pretty prevalent in those times. Men and women were more understanding and shared their partners more readily then we do today. Our culture doesn't encourage multiple partners or mates, unless you were part of the old Mormon Faith that believed in polygamy, or still follow more ancient forms of religion like paganism. In countries that practice Buddhism they may take more than one mate because a marriage in their religion is not a sacrament and is considered purely a secular affair. If you find yourself attracted to members of the same sex as well as those of the opposite sex, I encourage you to expand your horizons and actually indulge in those attractions, explore the feelings and intimacy that both offer.
Don't be afraid, empower yourself to seek and discover the benefits of both. You don't have to label yourself as one or the other, be open minded and explore. Youth is meant for taking chances, exploring hidden pleasures and choosing a direction for your life. While you are experiencing and opening yourself up to life and all it's pleasures you are going to begin to feel which group you form closer attachments to and who you feel more comfortable with. As I have said over and over again in other blog entries, experiment and think outside the box, above all else keep an open mind and enjoy the pleasure and sensations you are feeling. Release the feelings of guilt, that are fostered on you by religion and societal pressures there is nothing wrong with what you are doing, and everyone has tried it in some form or fashion at least once in their lives. Some believe that if you are gay or bisexual that you have chosen this path, and I can tell you, I for one did not make a conscious decision to be gay. I can tell you that over time I felt I could bond and understand males more than females. I felt more comfortable being with males and I felt closer to them than I did females. As I have told you I dated both for a long time, and over time the affinity I felt for males begun to outweigh what I felt for females. Most of my best friends are females, I feel a kinship to them, I think because we have similar interests and habits. I can also tell you this, if I would have been able to make a choice, I would never have chosen the course that I am on.
Gay relationships are harder than straight ones, and have their own internal pressure as well as the pressure from outside. All because society's views are that of being closed minded and repressive. We are taught that it is wrong to care for someone of the same sex, and it is preached against in the church and so forth. We have to deal with all those pressures, as well as the ridicule and hate that are spawned by those teachings. Which is why some people choose to hide their sexuality and live dual lives and hide behind lies. By doing such they carry a tremendous amount of pressure and guilt upon their shoulders. For a better picture of what I am talking about above I suggest that you read my entry on "Coming out a tale of fear" I talk about some of the same things in it. Societal norms and pressure put on today's youth about their sexuality and preference is extremely prejudicial and makes it hard for them to deal with the feelings that they feel inside of them, and with those feelings, comes fear of discover, fear of being different, fear of not being excepted, fear of being ridiculed and the total fear that everyone they know will abandon them. Trust me coming to terms with your own sexuality is one of the hardest things you are going to have to do. But as I have stated I am a firm believer that this is not a personal choice we are born the way we are and we gravitate and feel a connection with one or the opposite sex as we develop and mature more. The group we eventually align with or are drawn to is dependent solely on which group we feel more closely connected to and bond easier with.
When we are conceived without gender, the gender assignment doesn't happen till the 13th week of pregnancy or after. Hormones present in the amniotic fluid help the embryo develop into a male or female fetus. The hormone for males is testosterone and estrogen for the females. but up until the 16th week of pregnancy the developing genitalia are identical apart from the hormone that is present in the maternal system, which helps identify what sex the baby is going to be when born. So from conception till week 16 both the male and female zygote, embryo to fetus transition happens exactly the same, there is no way to determine what gender they are going to be, except by testing the hormone levels, and depending on the mother's hormone levels this too could be misleading. A woman with high levels of testosterone would give an abnormal reading at first as would a woman with the reverse, high levels of estrogen. In some rare cases human children have been born of both sexes. Having developed male and female genitalia. Again, this research just goes to prove that we are of both sexes till some point in the maturation process within the womb, therefore it is probable that bisexuality is a natural condition for us humans, and that we let society and religion taint it and make it wrong.
What you should come away with from here is that you shouldn't be afraid to explore your own sexuality, and should feel comfortable with what you do. There is no shame in experimentation and discovering for yourself what feels enjoyable. Don't let society pressure you into a role that you are uncomfortable with. There is no shame in remaining bisexual, maybe you find sex with both sexes extremely pleasurable. I see nothing wrong in that at all. Most of us, if not all have experimented. Some like me have found that we bond and attach more easily to men, over time the attraction toward men becomes stronger and we identify ourselves as being gay. However, others will find that the attraction to the opposite sex grows stronger as the grow and mature so they associate themselves with being heterosexual or straight. Though there are those that can label themselves anyway they want and still find beauty in both sexes. I know I do, though I openly consider myself gay, I still find some women very attractive and talk to them. Of course, I catch myself looking at men too and finding them attractive.
A word of caution don't let other people tell you what you are and what you are supposed to be. You are you and only you can decide what is going to make you happy. I have known so many men that have stayed in the closet and gotten married and had children who continue to play with members of the same sex behind their spouses back. I have even know a few that decided well into their marriage that they couldn't stand to live with the lies and deceptions any longer so they tell their family. Everyone gets hurt in that scenario. I ask you to be brutally honest with yourself and those around you. Don't let a lie destroy you and hurt the people you care about, and be sure you are ready to make a commitment before you jump into something. Again I suggest you try it before you knock it.
As always my hopes and dreams are with you,
Uncle B
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